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July 20, 2011

I guess I’m an adult now

It’s only taken me a month, but I’m starting to get the hang of being an adult and being on my own. But when I first came to Harrisburg I was so lonely. I was plopped in the middle of a city that I didn’t know, all alone, starting an internship with a news organization that covered a topic I was unfamiliar with–politics. It was hard adjusting those first few days. I’m pretty sure I cried daily that first week. But I think I’ve gotten into the swing of things now.

And although I have seen my family a fair share since I’ve come here–I have admittedly gone home a total of three times–I really do feel that I have learned how to live relatively alone. One thing that was difficult for me at first was figuring out what to cook for dinner. No one was here to make something for me, if there wasn’t food in the fridge I needed to go out and get some. I’m much better at this now and I try to plan what I’m going to eat for the week; today I had salad and cheese tortellini for dinner.

I’ve also gotten much better at accepting being by myself, something I couldn’t do at first. Just because I’m alone does not mean I have to be lonely. I have lots of friends who I could chat with, text or call if I wanted to. Being alone only is a bad thing if I choose to make it bad. In reality, being alone is quite nice. It’s truly wonderful coming home from a long day at work and just being able to unwind–that being said, sometimes it would be nice to have someone to talk and eat dinner with.

Lately, with my internship coming to an end in only a couple of weeks, I’ve begun to think about what I’m taking away from this experience. I have without a doubt become a better journalist. I am so much more confident in my writing than I was before. Before I always thought I wasn’t a real journalist because I only covered college news; I always thought that I had to say my occupation was a “student journalist” not just a journalist. But I really feel like a bonafided journalist being here. I talk to politicians, I talk to universities, to unions, to lobbying groups. I get published and sometimes my work gets put in print around the state. It’s a great feeling. What I’m writing matters.

I’ve also come away with the knowledge that I can grow up, move away and be alright. Before I was always self-conscious because I had never lived away at college. I thought the fact that I commuted and lived with my parents made it seem like I was less mature than my dorm dwelling friends. But in my opinion at least, what I’m doing right now is way harder.  There wasn’t a RA here to help move me in, or people who wanted to be my friend so I could join their organization. I wasn’t surrounded by other equally confused and nervous people.I started completely fresh and alone. And I didn’t die. So that’s a good thing.

The fact that I paid for my apartment also makes me feel pretty self-sufficient. I’m glad that this place is mine and I didn’t have to rely on someone else for it (my parents did pay for it at first, but I paid them back, it counts!). I also pay bills now, like for my internet.

I don’t know. I guess I’m not an adult, but being here certainly makes me feel like I’m one step closer to being one. I should mention that I have snack packs, froot loops, mac n cheese and peanut butter and jelly in my kitchen.

Filed by at July 20th, 2011 under Uncategorized
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One Response to “I guess I’m an adult now”

   Ruthie — July 21, 2011 @ 7:45 pm    Reply

lovelovelove. While I have had the experience of being out on my own, financially independent etc, i have never lived alone, always at least a couple roomies! What a good experience to have, and a very positive way to look at things! Awesome 🙂

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